Orks vs Dark Eldar

Meals on Wheels: Ork Turn 1 – Planet Aenna

1750 Orks vs 1750 Dark Eldar

Stryke was excited.

He was limping through the corridors of his newly looted Gay Marine Starship, excitedly heading towards the engineering decks. He had never fully recovered from some of the wounds sustained in conquering the last part of the galaxy his Waaagh infested.

But Dallags new project would ensure that that was no longer a concern of his. Dallag had spent every part of the last few months working on this project, Whole shipments of parts and munitons headed into Dallag’s workshop every day, as well as a massive shipment of black paint. More than one boy had had the shock of his life walking past as suddenly a gigantic and deafening roar erupted from the workshop.

Much of Dallags time hadnt been spent making his project work – that was easy – all he had to do was believe it would work and it would be so, it had instead been spent making his monstrosity as loud as was physically possible. He knew nothing less would have satisifed Stryke

Stryke had only just managed to maintain control of his burgeoning Waaagh despite spending the majority of the time on Painboy Alfray’s table, thanks in no short measure to his ambitious Nob Lieutenents being slaughtered by Chaos forces as they stormed the stronghold that formed the final obstacle for his last galactic invasion.

Now, he approached a different part of the Galaxy, with whole new worlds to conquer, many years of fighting promised, and many more delicacies to be tasted, and Stryke was determined that he would not miss out this time and would be in the thick of it.

He wanted to show his waaagh who was boss, that he was the biggest and strongest of all, and that the fact that he could no longer run across the Battlefield as quickly as he used to did not mean he was any less able to krump anyone and anything he came across. Dallag’s work would make sure that noone would ever doubt him again.

He stumbled rapidly into Dallag’s new workshop and there it was in gleaming black metal in front of him.

Stryke grinned eagerly and ran over to give Dallag a congratulatory thump around the back of the head.

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“Dey’re bloody weird I can tellz you dat for nuffink” Reakfaw absent mindedly said as he picked dried Gay Marine meat from his teeth

“Everyfink is weird to you Reafdaw” said Dallag. “You ’ave always had a few screws rattlin’ round your brain – Alfray didn’t do you right after dat nid shit bomb hit you on de ‘ead”

“Oi! I did a bludy good job I did – He is still walkin’ aint he?!” Alfray retorted

“Yeh, de’re aint nuffink wrong wiv me!” protested Reafdaw. “Anyways, wot I woz saying woz, those skinny purple little ‘omo’s do funny fings. Coilla tells me her Kommandos saw dey took some ‘oomies as pets – dey didn’t even krump ‘em dere and den!”

“Dat is bludy weird” agreed Dallag. “Oomies and beakies are only good for two fings…krumping and eatin’!”

“I ‘eard dat dey drink oomies blood for fun and play games wiv ‘em” continued Reafdaw

“Dey isnt all bad den!” laughed Alfray “Dey is all bludy girlie though – dey looks as if dey would break even if Stryke just flicked a snotling at ‘em!

“Wotz a girl?” said Reafdaw puzzled

At that point, Alfray suddenly spat out his snotling ale all over reafdaw in shock. Reafdaw looked up, about to use his grot assistant as a human club on Alfray, when he too suddenly froze.
Stryke had appeared in the doorway. Dallag grinned knowingly.

“Wot is youz lot plottin dis time?! Stryke bellowed

“Err….boss….its…err…we is talking about dose dark panzees dat buggered off and ran away when we chased em after krumping dose gay marines…we ‘ave caught up on ‘em you see and err…fugging ‘ell boss, sorry, I cant ‘old it in…wot de fugging ‘ell is dat you is wearing?! Its all black and stuff….and wotz dat mask all about?!”

The only response Reafdaw got was Strykes black gloved fist collapsing his face.

“Dis armour Dallag” Stryke said

“Err…yes boss…?”

“its da bluddy nutz!” Stryke started to leave, dragging Reafdaw’s unconcious form behind him. Before he left the room he paused and looked over his shoulder. “I wonder wot de panzees taste like?”

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“Right den boyz!” Stryke bellowed to the assembled masses of green that had flocked to him

“We ‘ave already finished wiv de last lot of planets we found, and da fightin ‘as run out!” The din of noise from the crowd rose, and growled with annoyance and jeering.

“I nose yooz lot is bored, so I ‘ave found us a hole new lot of pink-skins to fight! So yooz lot better be ready because we‘ve gotz LOTZ OF KRUMPING TO DO!” Stryke knew how to work the crowd, and his promise was met with a wall of noise, with tens of thousands of Orks cheering and shouting with bloodlust

Dallag’s new creation roared to life under Stryke, the noise deafening even over the muderous zeal of his fully assembled waaagh

“LETS GO GET ‘EM BOYZ! I IS BLOODY HUNGRY AND WANTS ME SUM EATS!!!!!! WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”


Deployment

Deployment: Hammer and Anvil – lengthways (again – that’s all 4 6th edition fights ive had now!)

Scenario: The Relic

Warlord Traits:
Warboss: Target Priority (reroll rolls of 1 to hit on enemies within 3” of an obj)
Lileath: Coordinated Assault (warlord + units within 12” have +1 to charge distance

Night Fighting:
Night Fighting from Turn 1

First Turn: Dark panzee. Orks forgot to try and steal the initiative!

Dark panzee Combat Drugs: Hypex: Affected Dark panzee Units roll 3 dice when running, picking the highest.


Dpanzee Turn 1

• The Dark panzee were clearly prepared in ambush for the Ork forces as the Orks inadvertently moved towards a coveted relic of the Dpanzee in the darkness of night. As the orks approached, the panzee used the advantage of their keen night vision and pulled their numerous transports out from their hiding places.
  
• The northern venom containing the Incubi opened proceedings by firing its splinter cannon at the large mob of boyz in the middle. The kustom forcefield took 2 of the shots, but two boyz had perished without even having known there was an attacker.
  
• In unison, the numerous dark lances from the raiders and ravager opened fire on the big mek’s battlewagon. The ravager penetrated and destroyed his wagon with ease. The explosion was so large, that 5 burna boyz died in the explosion.
  
• The southern-most venom then unloaded at the dazed burna boyz, slaying 2 more with its splinter cannon
  

Ork turn 1

• The orks, realising too late that there were enemies in the night, surged forward to try and find their foes. The remaining battlewagon moved toward the southern venom that shot the burnas, and the 20 boyz inside unleashed a storm of lead at the skimmer, leaving just a smouldering wreck and 1 dead trueborn where it used to be.
  
• The biker boss roared his bike into action, hugging the blind side of the battlewagon and unleashing his bike’s dakkagun at the now open trueborn, killing 1 more.
  
• The meks that used to be in the now destroyed battlewagon fired at the dark lance raider directly ahead. Their kustom megablasters unleashed orkish plasma at the raider, managing to destroy its dark lance.
  
• The large mob of boyz shot at the Wyche’s Raider dead ahead of them, and managed to knock a hull point off it.
  
• The lootas meanwhile thanks to night fighting couldnt see the dark lance ravager. Instead they focussed on the northern venom, blowing it up spectacularly and taking one of the incubi inside with it. The Stormboyz zooming up the field followed the sight of the explosion, firing their sluggas into the incubi – with luck they managed to dispatch two more, though they were now denied charge range and left in the open! doh!
  

Dpanzee Turn 2

• The Dark panzee were unpeturbed by the clumsy ork counter attack as they sought to continue a strong first turn
  
• Attention from the dark lances continued to be paid to the remaining battlewagon. One dark lance manage to get through the KFF again, immobilising the battlewagon. (sniff sniff no deffrolla goodness today!) Another lance penetrated the side, immobilising the wagon again, this time stripping off its big shoota and taking its second hull point. The ravager then unleashed its three lances at the wagon, glancing twice and reducing it to zero HP.
  
• The burnas boyz suffered more fire, and were wiped out save for the big mek.
  
• The KFF did not save any hits this turn! that was 9 failed saves!
  
• On the other flank, the Stormboyz were now brutally exposed, and the hellions were quick to take advantage of this, steering their green goblin fliers to the Stormboyz, killing 2. Lileaths raider also fired its disintegrator cannon at them, killing a third. Lastly the other ravager fired its cannons at them, killing a further three. With their numbers decimated, the Stormboyz then had to endure a dual charge from the remaining incubi and hellions. The 2 incubi slew a Stormboy, but the nob then killed one in return, leaving just 1 incubi left. The hellions fared worse, not managing to inflict any wounds on the Stormboyz, even from HoW, who did manage to slay one back. Typical of their hit and run style, the hellions promptly ran from the fight, ready to fight another day. very lucky for the stormboyz!
  
• The wyches in the centre disembarked and charged into the big mob of boyz, only to be viciously cut down by the 56 shots of overwatch fire the boyz put in their way! Not a single wych survived…Lesson 1 – don’t charge 30 boyz! [this was a massive tactical blunder of hers - not having played the orks she has learned her lesson the hard way!]
  

Orks Turn 2

• the warboss meanwhile continued to fire his dakkaguns into the trueborn, killing a further 2, leaving only one to facedown the charge. As you can imagine, he didn’t last long.
  
• Loving their dakka after destroying the wyches, the boyz fired at one of the raiders, causing another hull point to be removed.
  
• The boyz that piled out of the battlewagon wreckage found themselves being flown over by more green goblin hellions. Not happy with this they promptly shot down the whole squad after 5 of the 6 wounds caused did not make their save in some more unlucky rolling
  
• With a roaring in the skies, the air support started to arrive in the form of one of the dakkajets. The dakkajet went straight for the heart of the Dark panzee force, blowing up the raider that lileath was hiding in. Unfortunately 5 wyches died in the resultant explosion, leaving lileath and a beleaguered squad dazed and in the open.
  
• The lootas were quick to capitalise, and immediately opened fire on lileath, slaying the remaining wyches but failing to wound lileath herself.
  
• Ending the orks second turn, the stormboy nob finished off the remaining incubi with a sweep of his power klaw and the Stormboyz looked for another target.
  

Turn 3 – Waaagh!

• The remaining Hellions regrouped and fired back at the Stormboyz that they were dancing around, killing the three Stormboyz leaving only the Nob remaining. The wyches squad with the succubus finished the job, gaining a pain token and feel no pain.
  
• One of the raiders fired its Dark lance at the newly arrived dakkajet in the absence of an easier target, managing to get the 6 required to hit and managing to blow off one of its supa shootas. The ravager with the dark lances tried to mimic this success, but landed no hits against the fast moving flyer.
  
• The ravager with disintegrator cannons fired at the big squad of boyz dangerously approaching the relic, managing to slay another 2 boyz. the big meks KFF worked for once and saved another 2 boyz from being disintegrated.
  
• The other dark lance raider started to see the threat that the big mek posed covering half the army, and fired its dark lance, taking him out of the battle in one shot thanks to it being double toughness.
  
• In the middle of the field with their eyes on the relic, the warriors disembarked from their raider, and rapid fired into the battlewagon boyz squad, killing 9 orks!
  
  
• The Battlewagon boyz promptly returned fire, joined by the large boyz squad in the middle, managing to wipe out the squad – The dark elder were running out of troops able to hold the relic!
  
• The second dakkajet entered into the fray as the first moved up and fired its waaagh infused guns into the succubus wyches squad, slaying 6 wyches and leaving the succubus with 2 wounds less than she had. The new dakkajet opened fire, again with waaagh infused guns, at the ravager with the disintegrator cannons, but couldn’t quite destroy it, leaving it with 1HP.
  
• the warboss meanwhile revved up his bike to deafening levels and charged into the dark lance ravager, entering linebreaker territory and blowing it up spectacularly, in which 2 of the battlewagon boyz were caught in the explosion and vapourised.
  
• Unfortunately that drew a rather large amount of attention towards his corner of the battlefield…
  
• The lootas stayed on target and fired another volley of deffgun shots at the exposed and lonely lileath. 4 wounds were caused, but after rolling a 4 3’s (her save is 4+), she succumbed! (it did occur to me afterwards though that only 1 needed to go through as it would have been instakill)
  
• Kill the Warlord achieved!
  

Turn 4

• After the spectacular explosion the Warboss gleefully caused, the Dark panzee guns turned to him almost in unison. The Dark panzee realised the battle had begun to turn away from them, and they decided to focus on gaining the decisive precision targets that would gain them the win.
  Unfortunately for the warboss, that meant a lot of firepower headed his way. The remaining ravager fired its cannons, taking off a wound, as did one of the raiders. It also meant that the Hellions fired their Green Goblin boards up and flew over to Batman, throwing some pumpkin bombs at him taking off his final wound!
  
• This of course infuriated the Battlewagon boyz, who then shot and destroyed the last of the hellions. Finally this world was free of comic book references!
  
• once again poor saves came into play with the bikes exhaust cloud failing to save any of the warboss's wounds!
  
• One of the raiders went for the line breaker objective to compliment killing the warlord, and made it across the board and behind the dakkajets. If this could remain as it was, the only thing stopping a Dark panzee victory now was the big boyz unit grabbing the relic for 3 victory points.
  
• To this end the remaining dark elder concentrated on the boyz what was left of their firepower, but only took out a single boy. Nonetheless, the dark elder were in the lead after an excellent strategic turn.
  
• The Orks care little for strategy though, and were more concerned about krumping what was left of the panzee. The orks had a lot of firepower left, and started off by the dakkajets and lootas finishing off the ravager and destroying the raider.
  
• This left only the succubus squad and 2 raiders left on the board, and the large boyz squad unleashed their lead at the squad, killing the remaining wyches but leaving the succubus alive.
  

Turn 5


All the dark elder had left to do was consolidate the raider at the back to keep the linebreaker objective, however the lootas had other ideas, and managed despite the 3+ cover afforded to the raider to destroy it.

The boyz happily picked up the relic in the middle of the board, and cast a challenging glare over to the succubus and raider.

a 5-2 victory for the orks! good times!

test

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